Black Friday Blues
November 27, 2014 30 Comments
She’s gotten frustrated over the dozen or so Facebook posts about boycotting retail stores that are open on Thanksgiving. So she says to me, “The next time I see a post like that I’m going to respond by saying, ‘If you’re going to not go shopping for that reason, then you need to not use your computer or phone and not watch your TV all day on Thanksgiving.'”
She’s right because I work in the cable/internet industry as my day job until I become a best-selling author, and I’m having to work today on Thanksgiving so that I can ensure people continue to get their cable and internet.
So basically, if you’re going to boycott anything, don’t go halvsies – go all the way and don’t use any of your services.
I’m talking full-on Sabbath Day Pharisee-style.
Don’t even think about watching the Macey’s Day Parade, because those 3,000+ parade-people are technically working by promoting their shows or businesses or causes.
And football? Forget about it! Even though I don’t consider athletes as citizens contributing to society, they’re also working for their paychecks. So if you’re going to boycott retail stores, stay home by all means, but don’t turn that TV on!
And heck, don’t even drive the car because that means highway patrolmen have to be stationed on the road to check your speed.
And for the turkey’s sake, don’t go to any grocery store – even if you had committed the unforgivable sin of forgetting the potatoes or Egg Nog. That’s right – you’re stuck with no mashed potatoes for your Thanksgiving table and your family is going to taunt you about it for the rest of your life and spit on your grave. (“That’s for Thanksgiving ’14! Patooey!”)
So basically, don’t feel bad for the people working on Thanksgiving – we’ve got 364 other nights of the year to have turkey and mashed potatoes. Personally, I’m glad for the extra pay so I can spoil my little girl that much more for Christmas.
But if you do decide not to go to Target on Thanksgiving night, thank you, in advance. That’s one less person I’ll have to stand in line behind when I get off from work to buy all my DVDs for dirt cheap.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
And help me quit my day job and become a best-selling author by buying my book here!